800-448-3000My Dog Died
Question
Hi, so my dog died in March and I felt broken and I didn't know what to do. Well now my parents brought home a new puppy a month ago and didn't tell me or my siblings about this. I got so upset, started crying and stopped talking with them for a little bit. This puppy is always chasing my cat and my sister's cat. This upsets me. I don't know what to do. I'm upset about everything and I don't know what to do and I'm looking for some help please when you have time.
Counselor response
Thank you for reaching out for help when you are battling such a complicated and probably frustrating situation. I am sorry for your loss. Losing anyone in our lives is hurtful and a huge adjustment, and the loss of a pet definitely counts; pets often become part of our family so losing them takes time to overcome. Having a new puppy in your house brings many new feelings. You were so incredibly smart and brave to reach out for help so you do not have to manage this new addition to your family alone.
When it comes to pets, it is easy to say that they are one of kind. Each animal has its own personality and role in the family. When that pet passes, there is definitely a loss or hole in the family that others are forced to try and fill; no matter how hard they try, the spot isn't quite filled the same way. At the same time that everyone is trying to refill the newly formed opening in the family, each member of the family fills the opening at their own pace and on their own time. It sounds like you wanted more time to cope with the loss of your pet, but your parents were ready to try another way of filing that spot.
Keep in mind that your dog will never be replaced because he is unique in his own right. Even in your heart, your dog will forever remain part of yourself that cannot be taken away by another animal. Similarly, new animals are never replacements for our passed ones; rather they are another opportunity to grow in love with another family member.
This is a really hard process to go through and it might be helpful for you to a little bit of research on your grieving process, so you can talk to your parents about how you aren't necessarily ready to love this new puppy yet. Please take some time to look at our articles on grief to help this conversation: Grief
Go at your own pace with your grief and be honest with your family about needing space from the new puppy until you are ready to open up a new part in your heart to love him. It is OK to take your time!
Please continue taking care of yourself and reaching out to us as you need!
PC – Counselor