800-448-3000I'm Scaring My Friends
Question
I'm cracking after a few days of self harm (cutting (various tools)), a painful breakup (initiated by me (didn't wanna, felt I had to)), and now my dad is punishing me (taking away my phone and computer) for having an emotional breakdown without reason, going behind his back to get help and being unable to follow through on a promise. My dad is a major trigger for anxiety attacks. I am now behaving in very erratic and unusual patterns that are scaring my friends, quite possibly because I am appearing to take pleasure in pain, both my own and theirs. I need help.
Counselor response
We are glad that you found the courage to reach out for help today. It sounds like you have an enormous amount of pressure coming from a lot of aspects in your life, and you are reaching your breaking point. When that happens, people can tend to act in ways that are not like themselves. It took a lot of strength to contact us for help. Reaching out is the first step in getting the support and resources that you deserve.
While self-harming can be a way to cope when you are feeling out of control, it is a negative coping skill. It is dangerous. While it may seem to help in the moment it can lead to more negative feelings overall which creates a harmful cycle of needing to then cope with more feelings. Like any skill, positive coping techniques take time to learn and improve on. Our website, yourlifeyourvoice.org, has a list of 99 coping skills. You could look that over and pick ones you find helpful to try next time you are having the urge to self- harm. Here is the link:
Along with coping skills, you deserve to have a support system. It sounds like you don't find that in your dad. Is there any other adult in your life you feel like you could open up to about what is going on? It can be very scary to handle these things alone, and we want to make sure you get the help you need.
While we are glad to email with you, it sounds like your feelings are intense and a more immediate form of communication would be helpful.
There are several ways to speak directly to a counselor:
CHAT with a Your Life Your Voice Counselor Monday – Friday, 6:00-12mid, CST through www.yourlifeyourvoice.org
TEXT YLYV Counselors 7 days a week, 2:00 pm-1:00am CST available through www.yourlifeyourvoice.org
There are also counselors available to speak to you by PHONE 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at
1-800-448-3000.
Thank you so much for taking this step for yourself. We are here for you, and we hope you reach out for more support!
Sincerely,
Katie, Counselor